Archive for July 9, 2009

Kary-o-kay

Posted in General Life with tags on July 9, 2009 by theerivs

#1, Nascar, and Towelie went up to  JWH last night for a bit of Karoake and beers. After our collective ears were bleeding, I do  beleive karoake should have a little clown with a hook if your to bad, or a breathalyzer so the machine doesn’t work if you blow too high, like .2 or something.

I sang “You may be Right” by Billy Joel, my throat was feeling bad, and I wasn’t into it, but when the girl who does the Karoake begs me to sing, while rubbing up against me. Yea I don’t care if I got a hole in my throat I’m singing.  Fricking Towelie wanted me to do Snow “Informer” , Yeah that would kill me.  Though I like it when other people pick songs for me, some I won’t do, but I don’t mind doing a goofy song. I am an attention whore ya’know.

Had a few laughs, Nascar affixed to the race news, by the way I’m a huge Kyle Bush fan now, just because everyone who I talked to about Nascar hates Kyle, plus I just love saying “Kyle Bush!!” can’t get anymore hick then that.  I wanted Towelie to sing Barry White in a Towelie voice, would be awesome.  I was trying to aggravate #1, I just love doing that, the more pissed she gets the more funny i think it is. Though I have to watch it, she goes for the balls…literally.

Last night, because my ears were bleeding, and I some of the people sounded worse the taking a rusty nail to a chalkboard. I am going to offer some tips from my vast experience with karoake, from an barstaff and patron perspective. 

Here’s some tips -

1. Pick a good song – Song Selection is your key. I try not to pick to hard of a song. I know my limits.  If you have a deep voice, don’t pick Micheal Jackson, or if you got a high voice, try to stay away from say Barry White. Also pick a song that is upbeat, and fun. You may suck, but if your having fun it shows, and the crowd will have fun.  If you suck like I do, try to pick a song that doesn’t have a lot of words, and maybe some musical interludes. 

           1a- Depressing songs – DON’T! NO! Save it for the car ride home, where you can cry in peace.

           1b -Cheesy 80’s/90’s music - You can’t go wrong, usually. May I suggest AHA- Take On Me.

2. The words are on the screen – Use them. No excuse to mumble. If the song is a fast one and you can’t keep up, you should of refer to rule one.

3. Be a little animated – You may suck, but if you dance around like a jackass. It will make the crowd laugh, and get into it a bit.

4. Have fun – Don’t be to serious, this isn’t American Idol. It’s a bar, and people want to be entertained.