I love my Mother so much, I want to put her in a home to protect her…from me. Last couple days she been getting on my very last nerve. My Mother has an awesome skill, she can wield guilt like a battle axe, crushing all that oppose her.
My Father asked me a week ago, to drive my 88 year old Grandmother to his house for Easter. No problem Dad. So Yesterday I look into our fridge and see 2 large hams, and bunch of other food, and I was like, “What’s this for?” Her reply, “Well I’m making it for whoever wants to come over for Easter, even if I have to eat it myself.” She keeps dropping these little comments, like “Going to be alone for Easter”, and other Woe is me shit. I know my mom is having a hard go with it, I’m not stupid. But listening to it is really getting to me.
Listen, for the record I hate Holidays, ever since my parents got divorced it’s like some struggle of guilt. Hell I don’t even want to celebrate Holidays anymore they beat me to the ground already with guilt. Tell you the truth, the best holiday I had is when I told everyone I was working, sequestered myself in my little apartment, ordered a turkey dinner to go from a local greek restaurant, and just chilled out watched movies all day.
So I got Good Friday off, It’s supposed to be nice. We got a daytime nurse..So I figured I would go golfing with my friends. I’m really looking forward to it. My Mom asks me today, “Are you off Friday?” Now you know my apprehension of this, I had a big eternal battle. I endeavor not to lie, so I told the truth. “No I have off, but I have plans. I’m going golfing with my friends” Her reply, “Oh well if anything happens, I’ll just call 911″ I almost lost it. I just said goodbye.
I hate to complain, and whine. It’s not me, but I need to vent somewhere…that’s why I have this blog. So I don’t blow up at my Mom, and tell her to go get bent. I will do what I have to do, that’s who I am, and I will do it without complaint. It just pisses me off to no end, that I tow the line, while the man’s own daughter doesn’t even so much as call the guy in the last 3 months. I want to scream at her she’s a piece of fucking shit.
People say drinking cuts years off your life, It’s not cutting enough…I may take up smoking.