The big 4-0
Well every birthday I do a bit of freaking out. I have real umbrage with growing older. I don’t really want to grow older. Being old to me represents weakness, your body starts breaking down, and when you get to old you become a burden to others…and we ALL know how I hate that.
On the other hand I’m in disbelief I am still alive, and kicking. Even among my older friends from back in the day, they are mildly shocked. I lived a life on the edge. Walking 26th and California at 2am, eating a hostess pie with not a care in the world does take a little bit of insanity.
So the build up begins and wierd strange thoughts go in and out of my head. If I seem wierd or erratic it’s because I’m fucking freaking out over the fact I’m turning 40, and I’m wondering how the fuck I managed that.