Well Ginny is upset I left her out of my blog as of late. So I thought I would give her what she wishes.
Let’s start at the beginning, I call her Ginny as in Spoiled Ginny Brat, Not because she spoiled or a brat. She is a Ginny though,and looks like Connie in the movie Godfather. In that movie she gets in a fight with her man, and he calls he a Spoiled Ginny Brat, and like the movie if someone did that to her, I would take a garbage can to his fucking head.
Me and Ginny go long way back, she’s quite the shy girl, I remember my first meeting with her. She came into the break room at Walmart. I said to her, “Hi, there, I’m River. You know my Cousin (Who happens to be White Chocolate)” Her Reply, “Yeah…So” I was speechless. I was like…Ok then.
Let me give you a little background. I was working at Walmart, I was laid off at Governors State, and it was kind of a dark time for me. I had no money to speak of, and just in a state of depression.
Over the years though Ginny dated some friends of mine, and we became friends. At one point her, me, and my cousin were like three peas in a pod. I remember one time I was at home sleeping, then I get woken up by my cousin, and Ginny going, “Let’s spoon cousin”, and Ginny going, “I love to spoon” …God I hope that was Ginny liking my ear. I kicked the drunkards out…but it was funny none the less. Ginny likes to really pick the creme of the crop of douchebags for the men she dates, and when things went sour she would hang out with my cousin, and me. Which was ok by me, a pretty girl is always welcome to hang out with me, especially at this time of my life.
So at this time, I drove on a suspended license, among other nefarious things, and once in a while I would get pulled over, and arrested. A couple of those times Ginny was with me, and each and every time she came through to bail me out, when she didn’t have to. When I was down in the dumps and broke, I remember she would call me up to go out for drinks, and she would pay. I remember she would do just goofy shit, like one time she tried to strip on a pole, and fell off the strippers pole, or be so drunk she just pee’d on a tree in front of her house.
She really made me a laugh, at a period in my life when I really needed it. That’s when I fucked up and developed feelings for her, she let me down gently, but it still broke my heart. She still deserved my loyalty and earned my respect because she never stopped being my friend. I vowed she might not be my girlfriend, but I will always try to be there for her when I can.
Fast Forward a Bit she was dating a real winner, I won’t speak ill of him but I will call him Douchebag, or DB for short. DB has alot of his own demons, and didn’t treat Ginny very well, to the point where I was gonna drop a hammer on him at one point, but DB and Ginny broke up. I thought that Ginny could use a real nice guy, and there is none nicer then the German. My mistake, Ginny had a few demons to work out, and left the German to go back to DB.
Here is my quandary,and my ultimate mistake both these people are my friends, it will be the first time I played matchmaker, and the last. Sure between people things don’t work out sometimes, and when just one is your friend is easier. When both the broken up parties are your friend then it’s fucking tough as hell.
Present Day – Ginny broke up with DB again, and German is still trying to get over her. I understand his pain, I’ve been there before. Ginny has been spending alot of time with me, and I her. It’s dredged up some of the old feelings I had for her. Sadly the mockery of my life is that my life is one of loneliness. I walked dark paths in my life, and it has corrupted my soul, my flesh, my heart. The Gods mock me, by laying out my dreams before me to show me what could have been, alas it’s all illusions. Like dew it is gone in the morning light, and fades like a flower all too soon. As much as I fight my fate, and hope that one day I can attain my dreams of a normal life. I know the truth, there is no normal life…just life. I don’t think I could ever be the guy the Ginny needs in her life….I have way too many demons. I just pray she finds someone to make her happy.
Where does this story end, where do we go from here? I don’t know. All I know are two things, Ginny is my friend, and has a special place in my heart, not because she looks good, or because the way she makes me feel, it’s because she has been there for me in my corner, time and time again. She has a special place in my heart because she earned it, and I do love her, but that love is unconditional. I don’t care who she is with, or where she is at, I will always love her, and I will always be there for her, if I can, and if she asks it.
The other thing I know is I never seen a girl demolish crab like I seen this girl . We went out to all you can eat crab dinner once, she was like watching some National Geographic TV show. I been known to eat alot, but this girl stacked so much crab on her plate, I was like god damn. I was afraid if I got my finger to close, she would try to crack that thing open. I got to say I was a little turned on by it, yet a little scared.