Since we got some new readers, I thought I would take some of my favorite Diary of a Bouncer posts from 2 years back and repost them. Some of you may or may not know I worked as a bouncer at several different bars, and security for strippers back in the day. Here is some of my observations. Enjoy
Women are beautiful creatures, but the female of our species in my observation are the more cunning, vicious, and vindictive of the two two genders.
When fighting with men, there comes a point when you get them in a position where they know they are licked in general. They will give up, unless their on some sort of drug then that’s a different story. A man knows when to throw in the towel. Women on the other hand will fight, argue, and gouge your eyes out if they have to just to prove a point. A couple of times when I had to deal with angry women proves my point.
One time in my life I had the pleasure of working at the south sides most popular dance club, we had 750-1000 people come through on a weekend night. On this one particular night. Two pretty girls start to argue, they are both dressed to the nines. Me and this other bouncer go over to diffuse the situation. Such pretty girls were throwing around cuss words, and saying things that would make a drunk sailor blush. I guess one of the girls suspected the other of hitting on her man. Well as I prepared to escort the ladies, one of them reaches over me and starts pulling the other girls hair. Despite my natural instincts of sitting back and watching the fight hoping a breast pops out, or they might actually start kissing each other. I separated the girls, the other bouncer grabs one girl starts dragging her towards the back door, I take mine to the front. Suddenly the other girl breaks free, and charges at me and the other girl. I tell another bouncer to watch my girl, as the charging girl makes her way towards me, I dip my shoulder, and as she charges I stop her, pick her up over my shoulder, and start carrying her to the back door. The whole time kicking, screaming, scratching, she even bit my back. When I got to the back door, I dropped her none to gently, she still tried to attack me, trying to whack me in the nuts, and shins with her heels. I gave her a little shove, and we closed the back door. She started hitting the back door screaming the usual something to do with be being an asshole, and having a small penis. Which if your gonna insult me, try to be more original I heard it all. She pounded and screamed on that door for around 30 minutes. If this was the only incident I would say ok, but time and time again girls act this way when they get angry, they do not stop.
Another time a guy was a little to drunk, acting like an asshole. So I asked him to leave. He said,” Ok no problem” As I was escorting him out, BASH!. Someone smashed a beer bottle over my head. I was like, “WHAT THE FUCK??” A girl was standing there with a broken bottle in her hand. The other bouncers grabbed her. Lucky for her I only had a few cuts from it. She was screaming and ranting about how to leave her boyfriend alone. I looked at her boyfriend the drunk I was escorting he just shrugged. Kicked them both out, and from down the block I could still hear her screaming, how I was an asshole, and had a small penis.
So men, be careful you may be physically stronger, but women are the more vindictive, if you still don’t believe me after this, just email Mr. Bobbitt, and ask him how his penis feels.