Archive for November, 2008

Happy Thanksgiving All!!

Posted in Uncategorized on November 27, 2008 by theeriver

I wanted to thank you the reader for coming here and sharing my insanity with me. Take care and have a happy and safe Thanksgiving.

Here’s a video for you…

What I’m Thankful for.

Posted in Philosophy, River with tags , on November 26, 2008 by theeriver

Well I was debating on how lengthy I wanted to make this post, but I said hell it’s my blog. I’m going to do what I want. So it being the first Turkey day for Chaotic, I’m going to give thanks to those people around me, that really make my life what it is, and for sharing this wild ride I call my life.  Now this is not in any order of importance, it wouldn’t be Chaotic if there was Order, now would it be.

People I would like to Thank, and who I am Thankful for.

My Family – It’s a small one, but these are the people that time and again, have been there for me. I hope that I am, and continue to be there for them, when they need me. These are the people I love with all my heart and soul.

My Father, Phil – The man who is there all the time, everytime. The man who first shown me what being a man is all about.

My Mother, Mara – She is the well spring from which I came. The woman who bore me, she was the one who sacrificed so that I may have a better life. She’s the one who put up with the drunks at Olympic Star on the midnight shift so that I wouldn’t go to school looking like a ragamuffin.  With out her there is nothing, there is no Chris, there would be no River.

My Brother, George – My friend, my hetero life mate. LOL! Through thick or thin we got each others back. Through hell and high water there isn’t anything we can’t handle, together.

My Stepfather,  John – This guy not only takes care of my Mom, but he has been there me time and time again. I respect the hell out of him, and he’s always there to help me. I hope in some way he knows that I try to be there for him when I can be.

My Stepmother, Margeret – She loves and takes care of my Dad, and that deserves my respect and love.

My cousin, Jim – though I call him Jamie, because that’s old school baby, and out of love. He got my back, I hope he knows I got his. I share this story with everyone I can, cause it’s just such an awesome story. One night I got a flat tire, and I’m stuck out on I-57. I called everyone I knew. The man who answered and drove his ass from Homer Glen for me was this guy.

My cousin, Melissa – Always a kind word, one tough cookie, she’s always there watching out for me. Got my back through thick or thin.

My Grandmother, Joe – She’s the toughest person I know, trying to teach me whats right and wrong, also trying to intill in me a good work ethic. When I was younger this women would pick me up on her day off and take me somewhere fun, like the sloughs to go fishing, or to the museum.

My Grandfather, Mickey – Who I am named after. Even though he isn’t really related to me by blood, he is the only grandfather I have ever known. He loved me, and was there even when he didn’t have to be. He instilled in me my thirst of knowledge. I’m proud to call him my grandfather.

My Uncle Jim, and Aunt Eileen – I wouldn’t be alive if it weren’t for the U.J. He is the greatest guy in the world. Doesn’t say much, but what he does say it’s prolific. My Aunt Eileen, a very giving woman, of herself, and of her time. She has loved me like I was her own child, and for that I am thankful.

My Aunt Millie, and My Uncle Bill – They have been there time and again, and I hope that they know it does not go unappreciated.  What I am most Thankful for is that my Aunt Millie (and Melissa) help my mom out alot, and for that alone I offer my undying gratitude.

My Uncle Peter – He makes me laugh, and that is the greatest gift anyone can ever ask for. He had a hard life, and in the past screwed up. From him I learned that it’s troubles come, but you have to get up and dust yourself and move on.

The rest of my family, My Sister in Law, My Nephews and Nieces, Cousins. Don’t think there isn’t a place for you in my heart. It’s just if I listed all of you I would need another blog.  I love you all, and without family you have nothing.

My Friends – They are the ones that inspire me, when I need inspiration, they are the ones that make me laugh, when I need one, their the ones that keep me sane, in an insane world. There are times in my life where I feel like a failure, but like in the movie The Wonderful Life, “No man is a failure, who has friends” With the friend I have, I am the richest man in Tinley Park, These are the people I’m Thankful for.

Scott – My brother from another mother, First time I met this guy I wanted to beat the shit out of him, but somehow we ended up best friends. He would give the shirt of his back for you, and not even complain that he’s cold.  His whole family, Mr, and Mrs Regan, Jenine, Dave. They treat me like one of the family, and I love them for it.

Tony – This guy is the most low key guy I know, but the funnest guy when he wants to have fun. He is there for me, and I just hope he knows even though I give him shit, if it ever came a time he needed me, I’m right there. Hell the guy tossed me into a bush, and I didn’t break his legs, right there should tell you that this guy is a good guy.

Chris- One of my longest known friends, hell he’s almost my brother. Like brothers sometimes we get into fights, but we always reconcile. He is one of the few people that I respect the hell out of. When it would be easy to toss in the towel, this guy still chugs along, and I’m proud of him for that.

Linsey – She has been through some of my darkest chapters of my life with me, and yet she still there.

Sherry – One of my biggest fans, always cracking me up, She’s such a good person, and even though life sometimes tosses her a curve ball, she takes it on the chin and keeps going. She’s a tough broad, How I know, she grabbed my package and almost ripped it off. LOL!.

Nora – She inspired me to take up this blogging thing, she is also the one that gets me to think outside the box. I’m thankful we reconnected this year, and hopefully never lose touch again. She also restored my faith that there are women out there that like good music.

Michelle, Jennifer, Karla – If I was Dracula, these girls would be my Lesbian Vampires. LOL!. Just good people, and good fun. They always bring a smile to my face, and though they sometimes get me into situations that could lead to trouble, they don’t mean it, and it makes life that much more interesting.

Niki – My little Dago Princess, her and Brooke are like the little sisters I never had, Fun, and adventourous. Niki, and Brooke’s S.O.’s Chris, and Eddie are real good guys too. They make sure to include me when they can, and they are just salt of the earth people. Genuine and real.

Erin – She has always been my sounding board first at GSU, and now through the internet. She always has a kind word, and fought her demons, as I fought mine. I consider her a comrade at arms. Even though we lost touch for a bit. I’m thankful we reconnected.

The Bishops – Brian, watches over me makes sure I don’t do anything to stupid. Mary cracks me up, and keeps in line, Both Amy’s crack me up. These are good people and I am thankful for them.

Stoiner, and Mike – Good friends, that keep my ass in line if I did get out of line, and if I got my ass in a sling they would help me out of it in a second.

The Sunday Crew- Todd, Dani, Rick – These guys make me laugh so hard my ribs hurt. I’m glad I got a chance to know them better this year.

Wolf – He’s a shady bastard, but he’s a good friend to not only me, but to my cousin.

Gina – She’s more shady then Wolf, but she’s a good girl, and cracks me up.

Jim – Even though he’s miles away, and we don’t talk that much anymore he’s not far from my thoughts.

Christina – I’m glad we got to know each other better, a good girl that I’m sure will go on to better things.

Mike aka Lestat- This is why I got into computers to make friends with good people no matter how far the distance, or where you may come from, or what you may look like.  I have many friends that were made through the internet, but Mike has been one of the longest, and the best of them. The times we spent in heated discussion over ventrilo  in game will be legendary, and always remember them.

The JWH Crew – These people I hope view me not just as a customer, but as a friend. Dokkus always there for me with a smile, and a handshake.  Carl – The coolest cat I know. Tom the man who taught me to avoid dirt piles. Ashley puts up with me smelling her hair, I mentioned Mary already so she ain’t getting another mention. Kathy, Tina, and Diane with those boots, damn they look good HAHA.  Rochelle, Phil, Amy, Deklan, Chris, CJ, Marty, Chris. Molly, Sara, Julie anyone else I missed. These people crack me up, and just make my life enjoyable.

The Durbins Crew – Heather – She is such a good person it warms my heart to see her. Though Natalie no longer works there she holds a special place in my heart. Holly, Sheryl, Penelope, Beth, Jamie, Petey, Jessi, Tom, Jimmy, last but never least Uncle Mike.  Just everyone there that makes it a great place to stop in and say hi.

The Teehans crew – Eileen thee best Irish Car bombs ever, because their made with love. Chris, Melanie. John the new bouncer, Eric. Great down to earth people.

Kenny, Steve, Chad – The Palatine guys, excoworkers, fellow geeks, and gamers. Kenny, and Steve used to work with me at FTD, they made a shitty job a half way decent one. Chad is their roomate. All good guys, and good for a laugh.

The Tinley Park Police – Guys like I mentioned before, plus people like Wood. Just watching over me, make sure the town I grew up, and love is safe.

RQA – well they pay me.

Well that’s about it, if I did not mention you, please do not take any kind of offense. I just wanted to point out the people that really made this year special, and give those people I love a shout out, and show that I am thankful to them for making my life a little better.  I have alot of friends in this world, and if I mentioned all of them I would need 4 whole days to type it all out.

Take care, and have a Happy Thanksgiving.

Chris aka The River.

What women want in a man.

Posted in General Life, Philosophy with tags , , on November 25, 2008 by theeriver

Ok so I sent a survey out to all the women, I knew I’ll give you the gist from the survey question by question. Then I’ll give ya an overview.
What do women look for in men?

-Generosity, and humor were the biggest answer.
-This is probably one of thee most subjective questions. You ask 20 different girls what they like in looks, you get 20 different answers.


-Either have hair, or  don’t, but have a clean style, avoid the comb over thing if your going bald, go ahead and shave that dome. One thing is curious dark hair beat down blond hair. Something about tall, dark, stranger with women maybe.  One thing also women don’t want you spending more time on your hair then you do.

Rugged, or Metrosexual?
-More women love the rugged type men, then the prissies. But they want a man to take care of himself. So basically go ahead get those nails cut, but skip the clear polish.

Do the shoes need to match the belt? Really?
-Yes they do have to match, but most women seem not as nit picky, but they do keep an eye out of major fashion faux paus. Make sure your not wearing white socks with dress shoes, and make sure if you got a brown belt on that your damn shoes are brown too.

Name Brands are they important?

– No, as long as the stuff fits good, and looks good your ok here. If your over emphasising the name brands its actually a turn off.

Financial situation important?
– Stability is important. Ambition is very important, with a hint of generosity. So if you have a shitty job, women seem to accept that if your trying to better yourself, and work towards a goal.

If your in love with someone, what helped you fall in love with this guy?

-Not take a girl for granted, consistency, communication, and humor were some of the answers i got back. One girl also told me her man was good with oral. So do some tongue exercises boys.

Are there things men do that really piss you off in general?

-Women seem to hate that men can tune them out, or they hate when you act one way around them, then totally different around your friends. Also seems women think we don’t keep plans very well.

What makes a man a man in your eyes, well besides a penis?
– Being there for his family, responsibility, have goals were some of the answers.

Ok Whats the deal with Penis Size?

-I asked this, cause I wanted to really know. I’m starting to think it’s more of a male hang up. Unless your penis is freakishly small, or freakishly huge I don’t think you have anything to worry about if you got the rest of your life together. Men’s Health magazine did a survey of 4,000 women and most of them agree it isn’t the penis it’s the man attached to it. We as men assume most women are size-queens it seems like they aren’t. So you don’t have to go out and buy those penis enlarging pills.


-You have to have a positive attitude, towards life. No one likes a mopey joe. So put away the emo clothes, and slap on a happy face.  Respect yourself, and others.

Why do women love Assholes?

–  I like this answer so much I’m going to use it verbatim. One friend of mine answered this.

“Because they reflect their own feelings that they’re not worth being
treated well. Because if a guy is an asshole, it’s a shortcut. Girls
assume assholes are superior to them and are thus worth chasing. Ew.
Not all women love assholes. Women who like fix-it projects,
punishment and to be reminded that they don’t really love themselves
love assholes.”

A dating guru wrote that women love Cocky + Funny attitude. Any truth to that?

– This is actually true to a point, but not so much cocky, thing more confident. So work on your witty comebacks.

If the guy is just an average joe, what is an attitude a guy can have
to up his status?

– Yes, alot of girls mentioned the guys they went out with aren’t traditionally the best looking. They just had wonderful attitudes, and made them feel special.

Your at a bar, and a guy wants to meet you, what would be the best
way? or even better what ways have worked?

– Friendly, direct, confident wins the day. Skip the cheesy lines. Just go up the girl say “Hi, my name is so and so….”

Any other tips?

Well guys after reading all these answers many of them are not surprising. If your looking for love, and your lonely I have a suggestion. Work on yourself. Brush your teeth, read some men’s magazines that don’t have Low Riders on them, Go workout, go take a fun class at a community college like a cooking class. Know how many women love a guy who can cook? LOTS.  A man who loves himself shows it in all he does, and women would want to be a part of that.

I want to thank all the women who sent me their answers, and took part in my little social experiment.


Posted in General Life, Philosophy, River with tags , on November 21, 2008 by theeriver

Don’t worry gentlemen, I did not forget about you next Tuesday I will have a post for you. What women are looking for in men. I sent out some questionnaires to all the ladies I know. So as I keep getting answers back, I will compile the data, and give it to you in presentable form.

Now I want to take some time to talk about something that has reach epidemic proportions. I think we really need to put a stop to it. So in that regards I found a website to help protect you, my friends from harm.

Protect youself with this website.

Together we can put an end to this scourge.

Also something cool at work happened, my company is having their 20 year anniversery this year. Their taking all the employees to Disneyworld this September for a weekend getaway. I can take a guest. If you suck up to me, maybe I’ll take you, but no one rides for free. Ass, gas, or grass baby LOL!

As per Mike’s request, this is what I asked the girls.


What do women look for in men?
Rugged, or Metrosexual?
Do the shoes need to match the belt? Really?
Name Brands are they important?
Financial situation important?
If your in love with someone, what helped you fall in love with this guy?
Are there things men do that really piss you off in general?
What makes a man a man in your eyes, well besides a penis?
Ok Whats the deal with Penis Size?
Why do women love Assholes?
A dating guru wrote that women love Cocky + Funny attitude. Any truth to that?
If the guy is just an average joe, what is an attitude a guy can have to up his status?
Your at a bar, and a guy wants to meet you, what would be the best way? or even better what ways have worked?
Any other tips?

What attracts guys to women.

Posted in Philosophy, River with tags , , on November 18, 2008 by theeriver
A women friend asked me what attracts guys to women. Even though this a crude generalization I think alot of men would agree as to my criteria. There may be other ones, and you guys out there feel free to add, or even correct me.  My expertise above the fact I am a man, is I’ve been looking and judging women for 15 years of my life, as they enter the door of any bar they walked through, I evaluated them, and as I sit there in the front of the bar watching that patrons, I see how they act.
Most men are visual in nature so thats where it all starts.
1. Your outfit…does it look good, is it seductive/sexy without being a whore. Do you have your own sense of style. Does the outfit fit you well. We don’t care about things about brand names, men can give two shits about that. It’s all about how well it looks on you.
2. Hair is very important, the style, the looks, clean, well groomed. If you have short hair you gotta really pull it off. Most men prefer longer hair though cause well if we wanted someone with short hair we would date someone named Bob.
3.  Common disbelieve amongst women is that you have to look like a supermodel to impress a man. That’s wrong. It’s playing up your best assets. If you have big tits, choose a bra that puts those puppies out there, got a nice ass make sure you choose an outfit that accentuates your ass. Also men notice wierd things on women sometimes like feet, and hands. We have some odd fascination with a well manicured hand, and with nice long nails. Not the one you see on the black women that look like werewolf claws. Personally though most guys don’t give a shit about it, I tend to have a thing about eyes. If a woman has beautiful eyesI just want to look into them all day. Then again, I’m a hopeless romantic….or a weirdfreak either one take your choice.
Though men are shallow, and intiially are attracted by looks, there are other things more intrinsic that will win a guy over any day of the week.
Attitude …
1. Confidence – Is important with men or women. If you have confidence it shows in all you do. Do you have goals, do you have a life, are you an interesting person, do have something interesting to say. Confidence is good, but girls run the danger of being too cocky, or thinking their shit don’t stink. Love yourself, and others will love you.
2. How do you treat people – Are you a bitch, or genuine nice person. Are you flirting with every guy in the bar, or just me. The slut may be able to get a guy to go home with her for the night, the classy girl who knows how to have fun will win the whole chalupa.
3. Funny, Challenging, Engaging – In other words do you sit there like a lump of coal, or do you posess a life. Do you engage me, make me think. Do you challenge me, and make me work for your affection. Are you funny can you tell a joke, but not only that can you take one. You don’t need to be one of the guys, or make a complete jackass of yourself (like me or Jackass) but you don’t have to be an Amish prude either.
Bottomline, it’s all about moderation. You can’t be over the top, but you don’t want to be a lump of coal either.
Some other tips –
1. Most guys aren’t really good at subtle hints. Don’t beat around the bush. Tell us what you want.
2. Guys need ‘me’ time – Even if a man loved you very much, we need some time alone, or with friends just to be us.
3. In a simplistic way, Men crave respect, women crave love – This is what relationships with men and womenboil down to. It’s a circle. Men crave respect more then love, not that we don’t like to be loved, it’s just we like respect more. Women crave love more then respect, not that women don’t want to be respected, but they crave love more. So Men that get respect from their women, will love those women more. The women that receive love from their man, will give more respect to them. That circle gets broken, then ya got problems.

As I get older…

Posted in General Life, Philosophy, River with tags , , on November 18, 2008 by theeriver

I have never envisioned myself to reach 36. I really don’t know how I am still alive with all the drinking, fighting, and other sundry of bad behavior. Tell you the truth, I really mellowed with age, scary thought huh. I was thinking back to what a Monday Hangover would look like if I wrote it at 21. So I thought I would entertain you with an average Monday Hangover as if I wrote it 15 years ago, now mind you this is a normal weekend.  My weekend typically started on Thursdays.


Thursday was 25 cent bottles at Cagneys, so I would hit there with Gus, my best friend at the time. Where we would progress to drive home very, very drunk. Gus would typically try to get in a fight, and I would have to work clean up.

Friday night, I had to bounce at W.C. Flicks in Shorewood. That night me and the other doormen were doing a couple of shots, also making sure we got a cut of the door money which would go for our breakfasts. It was standard practice to take a few bucks, so who was I to buck the system. That night there was a fight, I remember this fight because I didn’t like the douchebag that started the fight from the get go. So I grabbed him in a headlock, and progressed to drag him out. Ohh I just hit his head against the wall. Green bay (a guy thus named because of his love for said football team), and the other bouncers grabbed the other guy dragged him out the other door.  After a few more shots, and I was feeling pretty good we went to Georgios a greek restaurant open 24 hours in Joliet. After eating I nice meal on Flicks. Some assholes start up with us, so we take them outside, and progress to beat the shit out of them.  I finally head home, where it is almost 7am.

Saturday I go to my local hangout the Tinley Park Bowling Alley, started the night off with some pinball, or video games while I drink a few pitchers of beer with Gus. The rest of the guys start a poker game in the back. I don’t do so hot, but Gus is really sour that night.  He’s feeling violent, and there’s a nice corvette in the parking lot. Being the harbingers of doom that we are, we want to rain some misfortune upon others. So he takes my gun out of the glove box, (which luckily I emptied the clip before I gave it to him) He trys to fire off a few rounds at the nice car. I laugh at him, he’s upset I emptied the gun. I then take my knife, get out of the car and slash all four tires, he cracks the windshield with a rock. We leave laughing, and still drunk. We decide to go to Show-Shows. Show-Shows use to be in the heart of Cicero in the bad area. It was a strip joint/whore house. We get a 4 dollar wildwood soda, and watched the show. We didn’t partake of the services that night. On the way home Gus talks me into running into a construction horse with my car, that was pretty cool. Luckily nothing was damaged on my car. We finally make it home.

Sunday I get up, and call Gus, he’s dead to the world. So I decide to hit the boat. I play blackjack/video poker for 10 hours losing a shitload of money, depressed I go  grab a bite to eat, and head home.


That was a normal run of the mill weekend. Back then you could find me at a few places Cagneys in Oak Lawn, Tinley Park Bowling Alley, WC flicks in Shorewood, or the Riverboats of Joliet.

Though I mellowed I guess I haven’t changed all that much, instead of Cagneys it’s Durbins, instead of Tinley Park Bowling Alley, it’s JWH.

I am still a creature of habits, and the problem with habits is they die hard. Sometimes I wonder if I will ever grow up, more worrisome is I think I’m scared to.

Monday Hangover

Posted in Barlife, General Life, Philosophy, River with tags , , , , on November 17, 2008 by theeriver

Well this weekend was one of those weekends where Caligula himself would of went home early, so I apologized before hand if my weekend report is incoherent, or if there are gaps in the evening. Cause from this weekend there are so many holes in my memories, it’s worse then swiss cheese.

We start of Friday, where I stopped by a friends house, it was nice her family was there, her fiancee. I just had a few beers there. I like going there they are some good people. Salt of the earth. I can’t wait for my friends wedding it will be a good time.

Then I headed to good ole JWH. One of my favorite local bands were playing Acoustically Challenged, Good band, and a Good bunch of guys. It is there I commenced with the whiskey. I promised myself I shouldn’t have any shots because of my oral surgery. Well even though I planned on behaving, the forces of evil had different plans. My friend Jackass, and The German came out. The German never comes out. This isn’t good. A guy I’ll call The Pope, a good friend, and more straight laced then us, was in a drinking mood. By the eighth shot, I start to think I may not be keeping that promise to myself.

We usually go to Teehans, and Durbins at the end of the night, because the Pope wanted to go to Durbins to talk someone we make our way to Durbins in the middle of the night. The bartender I have a little crush on was working. I was happy. Then on our way back, we had to get an Irish Car bomb, damn Teehans!!!.

So went back to JWH, where we finished rocking out the night with Acoustically Challenged, and did a few more shots. At the end of the night I was kidnapped by a couple of Jenny’s and went to Kickoffs. Had a few at Kickoffs, then finished the night at Olympic Star.

Saturday was my friends Jackass sister’s birthday, call her Jackassette. We started the night at her place downtown. Real nice condo. Awesome view of the city, and lake. Jackassette had her friends coming over, It was like Donnie, Mickey, Frankie, etc..etc.. I was like great a fricking sausage fest. They were some of the most beautiful girls I ever seen. Donnie was a very tall girl, about 6 foot tall, and me being a tall guy do tend to like the taller ones. So when she came over, I was gawking a little. Stoopid whiskey. Good thing my friend kicked me and reminded me to blink. Someone asked where she was from, she replied, “Utah.” Jackass piped in, “Yes you are.”  So after creeping out the pretty girls. Jackassette said another friend was coming, Lauren. Awesome another hot chick. Nope this was a dude…what the heck??  I drank almost a whole pint of Jim Beam before going out. There was like a sip left in the morning, and I was getting razzed about it. From there we went to Uncle Fatty’s for all you can drink for 30 bucks.  I lost count of the shots. I remember dancing at one point. . I flirted with every thing with breasts, which while I’m drunk probably seemed witty to me, but to the sober girls, probably looked rather bad.  I wish to say Uncle Fatty’s was the end of it. Nope. I went to another bar called the Store. This is where the Jim Beam meanness starts to get riled up a bit. Some young lawyer douchebags were trying to make fun of me. They asked me if I went to college., I lied. “Nope”. Of course they all went places like “Harvard” They all work at big firms, drive nice cars. yada yada yada. They finally asked me what I do, ” I work for a bookie, I beat the fuck out of people that owe him money.” I got a few free shots after that.  The bartender there was real cool, fellow Paisan Geno.  Next bar went to Frankies I think. This is where mean River shows up. A guy bumps my arm and spills my beer, I switch to beer when I get really drunk, He apologizes to me. I go, “Sorry doesn’t fucking give me my beer back mother fucker, you better buy me another one, or we’re going to have a problem.” The guy says, “Alright I’ll buy you another one.”  I wait for a few minutes, I see the guy talking to some chick, “I see you talking to some pussy, but where’s my god damn beer.” The bouncer comes by, “Calm down.” I reply, ” I’ll calm down when I get my beer this mother fucker spilled.”  The guy who spilled my beer shows up with one.  I feel sorry for downtown women, the men are all pussies there.

After a solid hour of sleep, I get woken up the next morning by Jackass and his brother wrestling.  We progress to head back home, but before that a photo op.  Me on a little scooter, I’m trying to get the pic from my friend right now.

So we head to JWH for the Sunday bears game, where I drink so much I litterally almost pass out I’m so tired. I eat and drink my full, but the Bears get anally reamed.  Though I gottasay even when the Bear lose, I still have a good time. The people I hang out at JWH, just make me laugh so much, my sides hurt sometimes from laughing so much. I wonder if people go into work the next day, and tell stories about the weirdos at JWH. I won a free Bears package next week, even though I’m doomed never to win Bears tickets, it’s ok I’m winning something at least. Before I pass out from being so tired I had to call it a night early about 6pm.

I woke up, and I contemplated calling off I hurt so bad. I sucked it up though and made into work.

A couple things I’m disappointed about though is The German didn’t make it out downtown on Saturday, and I’m a tosh upset about that. Also my cousin was out and about Oak Park avenue, and I wasn’t there. I like partying with him, and to see him on my home turf is awesome, well as long as angry guy doesn’t show up. His birthday is coming up, the big 35, and I can’t wait to get him shitfaced big time, like toilet bowl puking drunk…Ahhh good times…good times.

Thee best music video ever….

Posted in Pure Insanity, River on November 12, 2008 by theeriver

I really have nothing to write about, so I would thought I would give you a video. Thee best music video….EVER!

7 degrees away from Kevin Bacon

Posted in General Life, Philosophy, River with tags , , on November 11, 2008 by theeriver

Sometimes I marvel at how small this world actually is. I use to work with this guy at FTD. We’ll call him Bob. Bob was a funny guy, he was a rebel there, but he did his job well. As a group at FTD we would go out, and have some good times. FTD was hard work, it was almost like being in a war zone. US versus THEM kind of mentality. Bob lived, worked, played up in the Western Burbs.

At the same time another friend started dating this girl, we’ll call her Jenny.  Jenny and I become friends, and we all had some misadventures.

Well Jenny is on my Facebook, I saw me and her have an odd friend in common. It’s Bob. I was shocked. I was like how the hell does Jenny know Bob. She hasn’t responded to me yet, but I have a feeling it’s college. I think they both went to ISU.

You might not be amused, but this stuff happens to me alot. I won’t see someone for years, then out of the blue I run into them at an odd place or time. I run into someone I know at a real random place. Like one time I ran into a high school friend in Disneyworld. I knew he was going on Vacation in Florida, but what are the odds we would see each other at the same time, at the same place out of millions of people.

I just find this world is sometimes smaller then you realize, and that maybe it’s true we’re all just 7 degrees away from Kevin Bacon.

I just want to say as well Happy Veteran’s Day, to all the Vets. Thank you for giving me the Freedoms I enjoy.

Monday Hangover

Posted in General Life, River with tags , on November 10, 2008 by theeriver

Since I had off Friday from work, lets start with Thursday. I went to a psychic. Now the psychic was good with my past, and present. Which was really cool, but she really didn’t get into my future all that much. Heck I know about my present, and past. She was good, in terms she could pick up alot about me. I had several readings in the past, I got to rate this one a 3 out of 5. I think it could of been better.

Thursday night when I dropped off my friend. Her neighbor had a nice Samsung 22 inch monitor sitting on their doorstep. I guess UPS just dropped it off or something, and the neighbors weren’t home. It took all my willpower to not turn into the old River, and Gank that. It would of looked so nice on my desk too. Oh well, it’s easy to be good when people are watching, I’m sure I’ll get some Karmic reward for being good when no one was watching.

Friday I had a wedding to go to. It was small, but nice. I like dressing up once in awhile. I don’t do it that often. ZZtop was right though, girls do like a sharp dressed man. I got to see some old friends, I haven’t seen in awhile.  It kinda sucks their all married, kids, and settled down. That kind of stuff upsets me a little. Especially since one of the guys that I saw at the wedding got married to a girl I really liked back in the day, but fucked it all up.  They just had twins. As for me I got really smashed, crashed at a friends house.

Saturday, I went to a friends house, and just chilled watched a movie called Flock, it sucked arse. This friend of mine is 33, and acts 83. She doesn’t like going to bars, she hates the fact people call me River. She thinks it’s juvenile. She also thinks I drink too much, party too much, etc. etc.. I know she cares about me, and all that. The problem is, it’s who I am.  I asked her, if I was the type of guy that stayed home, and didn’t do anything, would I be as interesting? She said I was right.

Even though she begged me not to go out. I did anyway. I like seeing my friends, and the band was rocking at JWH. I saw a couple girls there, they knew me, I had no clue who they are though. Some girls are good at faking orgasms, I’m good at faking that I know you. It’s funny though if I know you, sometimes I fake like I don’t. I think it’s funny. I didn’t drink too much, and I did go home early though 3am about.

Sunday, I had to go into work for a bit, otherwise I just rested. I did get the drunken calls for not going up to the Bears game, which I wish I could of been there. Oh well there’s always next week.