Wakes and Funeral Services.

Let me first say, I hate wakes, and funerals. My ideal way to pass from this world is to have no one really know if I am dead or alive. No wake, no funeral. No nothing. Hell the only people I truly want to know I passed is my family. Even then not really.

Yes Wakes and Funerals and such are ways to put a close on things, to finalize the moment of someones passing. Not me. I want people guessing. “Hey I haven’t seen River in awhile, I wonder what happened to him, I think someone saw him at Dunkin Donuts the other day.”

I don’t want to remember someone as dead and sick, I want to remember them alive.  Thats how I want people to remember me, no tears, no sappy songs.  I want to be remembered how I lived, not how I died.

So if you know me, and I disappear don’t take it personally.

I went to the memorial service for a good guy yesterday, he will be missed. I refuse to remember him as the guy that died from lung cancer. I’ll remember him as the guy who called me “Mr. River”, the guy who loved to cook, which was nice cause I loved to eat. I’ll remember the guy who at 60+ was right next to me in the biggest brawl I ever had a bar lending a hand. I’ll remember the guy,  spending countless hours together would tell me stories of his past, all the while making me laugh.  Finally I’ll remember the guy who at the end of the night would go, “Mr. River we need a shot.” Then we would have a shot of Crown Royal, and end our day.

Well Jimmy, I’ll meet ya at Dunkin Donuts, get me a large coffee, extra cream.

5 Responses to “Wakes and Funeral Services.”

  1. I think it is really nice that you went to the wake, despite your feelings about them. That’s the thing about you Riv, you are a loyal friend. Let me know if you need to talk. I’m here for you.

  2. Thanks, thats appreciated.



  4. Riv, I understand how you feel…..but you’ll be gone and it won’t be really about you…it will be about the family and those that are left behind you. They need a time to come to grips about the passing(or let’s just call it what it really is,,,the death) of their loved one.Everyone has a different way to handle this,but family needs to hear and see that the person THEY loved was also loved,liked ,respected,etc….This is the one time that we really are over ourselves….This is why after the WAKE and the FUNERAL the IRISH have the big lunch….this is when we hail our Chiefs and Chieftans…our Princes of our Families and Our Queens of the families…those who brought us up to do right and always remember where we came from,and to where we could go…It is a passing,but it is also a passing of the Guard….there should always be someone to pick up the SWORD and carry on in the tradition that was put down generations ago to keep your family name good and to try and a make a differance in the world,no matter how small………….but that’s just my way of thinking about it

  5. Hey River,
    Sorry about any loss you never told me about. I would notice if you weren’t around. My Dad is real sick these days and I spent my afternoon talking with him about my Mom and where to find things he knew we may need in the future. I told him that I wished he wasn’t sick. People value you more than you think. B.

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