Archive for March, 2011


Posted in General Life with tags on March 31, 2011 by theerivs
What can you say
to someone who has always been one of
the most essential parts of your world;
Someone who took you by the hand
when you were little
and helped to show the way.
What do you say to someone
who stood by to help you grow,
providing love, strength, and support
so you could become the person
you are today?
What can you say to let her know
that she’s the best there is,
and that you hope you’ve inherited
some of her wisdom and her strength?
What words would you say
if you ever got the chance?
Maybe you’d just say,
I love you Grandma,
and hope she understands…
–Author Unknown
I have to remember even though that she may have recieved a death sentence, she is not dead yet,  to spend some time with her, and enjoy her presence while I still can.

Tales from the River Chronicles

Posted in General Life, River with tags on March 29, 2011 by theerivs

So I got this new leather trench coat, and I hopped in a car with my friend. I forgot where we we’re going, but it didn’t matter we didn’t make it.

As we turned on the main street of 167th. I blacked out for a second, when I came to I was half way through the wind shield, with shattered glass all around me. I crawled back into the car. The driver was out cold. I looked around. A oncoming car, swerved into our lane and clipped us. I looked down I noticed blood everywhere on me. I was pissed, I was getting blood on my jacket.  It was like an obsession of mine now, I was so upset about blood on my shit.

I went over to the other car, and the driver of that car was curled into a ball crying, I was screaming at him, going, “Get the fuck out of the car, mother fucker, you fucked up my jacket, I’m going to kick your ass.”  Now later as I thought about it, how monstrous did that look a big guy covered in blood, screaming at you, and wanting to kick your ass.

Cops finally showed up on the scene, and they got me to calm down. Then the ambulance showed up, and they put me in there, they had to take me to the hospital to clean me up. They called my parents whom I still lived with at the time. My Dad shows up, takes a look at me, and goes, “Holy Shit, what happened to you?” I told him, “I’m fine, go back home”  He goes to me, “Yeah, no you’re not fine, your face looks like hamburger.”  I think to myself, “great now that’s going to be attractive to the ladies”

So I went to the hospital, but I didn’t need any stitches, but I did have some cool scars for awhile.  I remember though sitting on the recliner a couple weeks after the accident. Felt as if  something was in my eye, I got it out. It was a shard of glass as big a raindrop almost. I was like you got to be kidding me.

Monday Hangover

Posted in Art of Man, Barlife, General Life, River with tags on March 28, 2011 by theerivs

Friday stayed in a recovered from Thursday.

Saturday I was going to stay in as well, but things don’t work out as I plan it. I met Torino aka Satan, Commando, Jackass, and Geek Princess. After downing what seemed my weight in Red bull and booze, I couldn’t stay in now, I had a great buzz going. So I met Tallegdega, and a guy who from hence forth be called Stitches, and why I do, I’ll get to that later.

So we hit 191, which I’m not a huge fan off. It’s crowded, and I hate people, but tonight I had a good time there, met some people I haven’t seen in a while. After 191 we hit JW Hollstiens, was an ok time….until Stitches started playing around with my beer bottle, He smacked the top of it to get it to foam up, then Tallegdega did and then I went to pour it on Stitches, Stitches grabbed the bottle, breaking it in his hand, and cutting it open.  I didn’t think he needed stitches, but the doctor thought otherwise…damn soothsayers.

Then Tallegdega, and me went to Durbins, where Jackass made a surprise visit. So we had a view there, and then went to Kickoffs.  Jackass was in a rare mood, so we almost got in a fight which was ok by me, I was in a fighting mood. Scary thing is Tallegdega was the voice of reason.  

Let me back up a bit, Saturday night, I saw something on Facebook about Cubs versus Sox, someone posted “Cubs are Fags” I didn’t know the dude, but I didn’t give a shit, I posted, “You’re a fag”, well it went back and forth, I cracked a few mom jokes. Sunday I wake up this guy is threatening me, like he will cut my throat open, and cool stuff like that. After seeing my Grandma in the hospital that Sunday, I was ready to rip this guys innards open, to quote the band Suicidal Tendencies, this dude “Wouldn’t know crazy if Charles Manson was eating froot loops on his front porch”  So after a little back and forth, I basically told him where I was going to be that day, and what time. If he wanted a piece of me, I was giving it away.  

Sunday I just went to JW Hollstiens with Jackass, chilled out had a few beers, watched Stepbrothers, then went to Durbins. Had a shitload of laughs there, cause we just got crazy, talking about time travel with the other patrons, and just being stupid.

Little Rough Around the Edges

Posted in Barlife, General Life, River with tags , on March 25, 2011 by theerivs

To say I’m a little rough around the edges today would be a gross understatement of my status.

So I went to the Hospital last night and my Grandma was asleep, so I didn’t disturb her, I just sat there for a bit, in case she did wake up. She didn’t  Driving home, it’s times like this that I must be strong, for those who can not be strong. I know in the days to come, my Grandma, Grandpa, and my Father are going to need my strength.

I was going to go home, but decided on having a beer, and some tacos at JW Hollstiens. Just sitting there vegging out, kind of in a wierd place. I hear behind me, “Yeeeaaahh!”, and “Allo”. It’s my buddies Tallegdega, and his cousin Ice. Coming in with Apple Pie Shots, and more beers…so much for a couple.  After watching the Cubbies, beat the Sox. They wanted to go to this new bar called Sullivans…I really wasn’t going to go…but fuck it, you only live once.

On the way there I needed some cash, so I stopped at a gas station. I thought I would take a piss too. So the bathroom was occupied. I knocked on it, to hurry the mofo. Black guy comes up to me, that dude has been in there forever. So after waiting a bit. The dude comes out, it was Tallegdega, I almost pissed myself laughing.

We went to Sullivans, and I swear Ice should be a politician, we ended up drinking with a dude from India almost straight off the boat. We were doing Irish Car bombs, and he never did one of those. He bought us a couple, we bought him a couple.

So with the Black Haus, Car Bombs, and Apple Pies in me…I felt pretty damn good. I called Jackass. Oh yes he came out. We went to JWH, then we went to Teehans. I was wearing a Flash super hero shirt…some one played Flash Gordon song by Queen. It was hilarious.

Then we hit Durbins, I was a dancing fool…or maybe a just plain ole fool. There’s a couple nice girls that work there that are really cool.

Afterwards we hit Dendrenos…where we run into Towelie, and couple other friends of ours. So many laughs my sides hurt today.

Yeah I’m hurting today, but it was well worth it, I needed a few laughs, and my friends were right there for me to deliver.

Growing Old Sucks

Posted in Art of Man, General Life, River with tags on March 24, 2011 by theerivs

I always had issues with growing old. I hate the idea of growing infirm, or losing my wits, or a step.  I hate the idea of one day becoming a burden for someone. That’s probably the major driving force of half the dumb shit I do, I just don’t like the idea of growing old.

Yet here I am in middle-age, nearing the 40 mark. My feelings about growing old haven’t really changed, and now with my Grandmother in the hospital for something serious it brings home another thing I don’t like about growing old.

That one day I will see the ones I love pass away, like my Grandparents, my Parents, Aunts, and Uncles and other people that have affected my life. In the last couple years I’ve been to more funerals than weddings, and I hate fucking funerals with a passion.

I know it’s a part of life, that it’s a crucible we all must face, but it doesn’t make it any easier. I said to myself I should prepare myself for the future, but how does one prepare for the death of the ones you love. Some of my friends have faced this crucible already, and I see how profoundly it affected them. How will it effect me? I don’t know.  I am not an emotional man, but my grandmother almost had me in tears talking about if this is the end, she had a good life, and that God has been good to her.  I must keep reminding myself to be strong, for those who do not have the strength to be, but sometimes that’s a hard thing to do.

My brother did a song one time, using the chorus from I think an Asia song, “Where do we go from here?”  That chorus echos in my head alot these days.  Where do we go from here?

My Grandmother

Posted in Uncategorized on March 22, 2011 by theerivs

My Grandma Jo is probably the most remarkable woman I have ever known. She worked for Sears for 30 years, and she always had Tuesday off, and on her day off she would take the time in my young life to pick me up. Every Tuesday like clockwork. She would do stuff with me like take me fishing, to the park, or to a movie. In fact if it wasn’t for my Grandma, I might not of been into computers. She took me to go see Tron, and Tron sparked my love for all things computer.

She would put me to work any chance she could, whether it would be making a bed, ironing, or helping her make her famous homemade ravioli. She tried to instill in me a work ethic, that would one day get me somewhere. She wouldn’t just put me to work, she would show me the right way to do it. She’s a tough woman, she raised 2 boys on her own, in a time when being divorced wasn’t the norm. Raising my father was no easy task either, let me tell you.

 At 90 years old she still goes bowling, and has higher scores than me, she still commands respect with every man in my family, so much we dare not tell her our screw ups, and she is still with it so much, she never falls for my bullshit.

She’s in the hospital right now, I won’t say it’s bad or good cause I really don’t know at this point. But I love her with all my heart, and hope she pulls through

Monday Hangover

Posted in Barlife, General Life, River, Stupidity with tags on March 21, 2011 by theerivs

Well the fun started Thursday, after work I had a few beers with some coworkers, then I went and visited the Cougar. I actually had a good time, probably cause there were some people I knew besides the people I went with, and I knew the guy playing that night. Then I ended the night at JW Hollstiens. There was a little drama involved in terms of Tallegdega, and Muffdiver getting into it, and My friends sisters getting into an argument, Nothing I couldn’t handle.

Friday night I met the Cougar at 191, Normally I don’t like that bar because it’s always too crowded, and I like to get my drinks in a timely fashion. This night it was busy, but not overly packed.  I hate going to new places, or bars where I am unfamilar with, cause my inner bouncer shows up and I analyze the place for assholes, or possible problematic people. Once I had a few in me though I started to loosen up.  I do enjoy hanging out with Cougar. She’s a cool chick, and I love giving her shit, sometimes though I go too far with it. Me being the stubborn jackass that I am really feels bad about it.  Then it was off to spend some time with my cousin White Chocolate, and our friend. I love hanging out with my cousin, it brings back so many good memories shared with him.

Saturday was Geek Princess’s birthday, also St. Joseph’s day, and it was a great time. Alot of friends popped up to wish her a happy birthday. It was a country band and I loathe country, but it wasn’t that bad. They played alot of Skynnard which I do like.  I’m a little worried about one of my friends, I think he’s fallen hard for this chick, and this might not bode well for the future. We’ll see how it all plays out though. The end of the night Tallegdega’s sister asked me if I wanted to go to the boat. Me being the idiot I am who loves to have adventure says sure. So we start our adventure, then she ends up falling asleep in my car, at first I was worried, but then I turn the car off to go get some cold, she popped up, screaming it was cold.  Yeah if anything happened to her, I think that would of signed my death warrant. I got her home safe and sound.  Oh yea I did wear red…so Bah Fungol

Sunday just had a few drinks with the friends, nice low key day. Even though I am a perfect gentleman, and no harm, or indecency wouldn’t befall Tallegdegas sister….doesn’t mean we can’t give him shit…and I did.